Thursday, September 16, 2010

Conspiracy Theory

Fawn, Whitetail deer (odocoileus virginianus), in wildflowers, close-up, USA

I've been experiencing life in a very different way lately. I don't know why. I could pontificate and extrapolate and anal-yze- but the basic truth is- I don't know why.

The last few days I've been downish- not depressed, not angry (well, a couple of times)- just not my usual self. Strangely though it's been fine. For so long I've been reading book after book that say "just be" "let go of the stories" and it seems that after much willingness that is what awareness is showing me now.

I have been experiencing life- late for kids at bus- them upset, deleted some writing that I had done, some work 'stress', updated news on a friends illness etc. and I've felt feelings about them, but not suffered. Truly, I have not been singing the "it shouldn't be this way" song. It is an absolute relief.

In addition to this there has been a conspiracy to cheer and lighten me. 2 Does each with twin fawns crossed my path yesterday- a gorgeous rainbow, a bluebird and completely unsolicited and unexpected outpourings of love from near and far. So, I have complied.
Why fight it?

I had this happen a couple of months ago too, it lasted about a week, a week where I just took things for how they were, without the mental chatter.

My mantra, starting about a year ago, has been that 'the Universe is created for my delight'. Anything that did not fit that description would be placed in the "oops- must be seeing that wrong- thanks" file.

This is a noticing only, no lesson, no teaching, no story- thanks for letting me share.

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