Wednesday, November 9, 2016

Donald Trump is the President Elect of the United States.

Good Morning.  The world is a little rocked and a little shocked this morning.  Hilary Clinton with her years of experience, her buckets of money and a carefully detailed and executed plan - her mastery of control - has been defeated by something seemingly out of control.

If you are feeling the despair and hopelessness that many of my Facebook friends are feeling, if you are asking yourself "WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?" step back with me and let's take a magnified look.  

We all know somehow that going to counselling or getting coaching is helpful - so what keeps us from going?  Sometimes it's time and money but most often it's that little ridge, that little lip of straight up fear that keeps us complacent, good enough and looking the other way.  I feel that my role in coaching, counselling and in energy work is to simply hold your hand while you look at what you are afraid to look at.  My meditation or in sessions with healers, coaches and counsellors is where I do this work myself- where I look at the darkness, where I look at the shadow. 

In order to reach a goal you need to look at the reality.  It's like my Visa debt, I feel ashamed about it, I wish it wasn't there, so I will tend not to look at it, in not looking at it it lingers- and in fact like a mold- it grows.   The truth is- and I am purposely using a lower case truth because it's not ultimately the truth- but the truth of the current situation here on our Earth is that women, people of color and people of gender diversity are not on an equal playing field with white, heterosexual men.  The capital T Truth is that we are all equal, how could it be any other way?  Equal doesn't mean the same, but it does mean that shared power, value and belonging are a higher truth and more and more people are accepting this.  But not everybody.  

Equality requires trust and trust cannot coexist with fear, when we fear we disconnect.  The people who voted for Donald Trump are disenchanted with what government has become, it happened here in the province of Alberta.  Both elections prove a truth that's been forgotten, the power IS with the people- with people united.  Donald Trump found a group of people who no longer felt a belonging or connection to the status quo, he gave them a voice and he developed a healthy relationship with these people- they trust him and he trusted them- he didn't put near the money or door knockers out there, he asked them to vote and they did.  
Where Donald Trump does not have a healthy relationship is with the other half of the population.  The half of voters who were left in tears early this morning.  These people do not trust Donald Trump and as I saw in many Twitter posts they do not feel a belonging in a Donald Trump winning America.  This half see's a bully.  

The antidote to bully is free expression. Now that 1/2 the country were heard it is extremely important that the other 1/2 do not fall silent.  To be truly heard requires some Grace, some composure.  Donald Trump and his team need to hear about women's rights, the true story of being a minority or of gender diversity in the USA (and in the world!), they need to be communicated to in a way that their hearts cannot help but open.  Donald Trump is married to an immigrant and he has daughters, I'd bet anything that in that big family of his there is some gender diversity!!  

People are asking this morning "what do I tell my kids?", you tell your kids that voting matters, that everyone is equal - even if society doesn't demonstrate it- it was true when slavery existed and women were considered chattel and it's True now.  You impel them to be kind and to be patient with a maturing culture.  You implore them to feed love and not fear.  

Let's fearlessly look at our accounts, we DO NOT embrace all equally right now- maybe you do individually- but I have to say that even the most Mother Theresa of us have trouble with someone (Donald Trump for instance).  When we are afraid we go to bully or rescuer or victim.  When we trust we become care, support and free expression- these are the tools we need now.  Feeding the drama, feeding the fear and powerlessness is not a productive use of our breath here on earth.  This is the opposite of covering it up and pretending- that's what people have so strongly pushed against- I often talk about the blanket over the dog terd.  You can still smell it, you still know it's there.  The dog terd is in plain site this morning.  This is not a personal metaphor for Donald Trump - it's a metaphor for the hidden stinkiness- the obstacles to love that are in all of us.  People who do not support equality are afraid, they feel threatened.  Threatened people react from that part of our brain that doesn't think, it's fight or flight- what I'm suggesting is that we do not unite there!!! 

Threatened people react from that part of our brain that doesn't think, it's fight or flight- what I'm suggesting is that we do not unite there!!! 

Let's stay in harmony and invite them in, listen to one another, if you have information that might alleviate fear don't stuff it down someone else's throat- we need to regulate (get safe), relate (get to know them) and then reason!! Brain science is now showing it.  Using your own self awareness this is the time to resist the temptation to become aggressive or to collapse, this doesn't mean you don't feel those feelings- it means you use those feelings to construct rather than destruct, Donald Trump is not your authority- you are!  Take heart in trusting the big picture, equal power, equal value and equal belonging of all people on Earth is the Truth- it is our destination, we will get there, in order to do so it's good to orient to where we are, please turn your passion towards social emotional strength- I am holding your hand, we can do this.  


If you want to know more about the concepts in this blog post please consider buying (Amazon or me) or borrowing my new book 'Circle of Trust', the time for Healthy Relationships is upon us.

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